You can catch more flies with honey

Sherri T.

These were the wise words of my dear mother Bella.  There are many other mothers who have used the same or similar words (as in catching more bees). 

The purpose of her words was to teach me the importance of being a kind person.  Her words were also meant to instruct me that choosing sweet over sour is an effective form of influence. 

Move over Dale Carnegie.  Bella had never read his international blockbuster How to Win Friends and Influence People.  She never referred to a textbook to provide guidance in her day-to-day dealings.  She never turned to a relationship handbook to advise her how to treat people.  She never doubted the wisdom of her emotional intelligence.  She never studied the rules and norms of civic engagement. 

“You can convince people more easily with persuasion and empathy than hostile confrontation.  Give honest and sincere appreciation.  Be genuinely interested in other people.  Try to see things from the other persons’ point of view.  Put yourself in their shoes and you may gain a different perspective.”

The message in a nutshell?  You can catch more flies with honey.  Funny how Bella was able to capture in seven words what a best-selling guru took several hundred pages to say. 

His profoundly important advice and her vital message seem more crucial than ever in a world that has seen a serious loss of civility in the public domain.  Loud and lewd have become the accepted, though hardy acceptable, norms of behavior. 

We now see more bullies play leading roles on the world stage.  Other bullies hide behind the cloak of anonymity in gifs, memes and other social media bafflegab.  You can say what you want, when you want, to whomever you want. 

It has become easier to offend and insult with no reconciliation.  No responsibility.  No repercussion.  No remorse. 

A world with no filter is a world that’s off kilter.

My mother was never a best-selling author.  She was never an organizational consultant.  She was never a relationship guru.

She was just a human being, who in her own unassuming way, spoke about the power of kind.  I would say that’s kind of powerful.