Don’t be a two-bit player in someone else’s movie. Be a star in your own.

Sherri T.

I was recently at my new office: the coffee shop in the brick-walled building down the block.  I have found it to be the best place to write WOOM blogs.  Every completed sentence is rewarded by a sip of coffee and bite of chocolate (the reward definitely worth the effort). 

I was just about to put pen to paper when I had the nicest surprise.  Dear colleague Vanessa, whom I had not seen in years, walked in the door.

After the requisite how are you’s and what have you been up to’s, the discussion drifted to (was steered toward?) WOOM, as it does with most of my conversations these days.  I assured myself that this subject isn’t an obsession – just top of mind.  (Is there a difference?)

Vanessa had often talked about how much her mother meant to her and I knew that she would have a thoughtful contribution with respect to her mother’s wise words.  I wasn’t disappointed. 

Vanessa’s mother, Julyan, said something 25 years ago that still rings loud and true today. “Don’t be a two-bit player in someone else’s movie.  Be a star in your own.”

WOW. 

There are many meanings to these wise words.  Julyan had provided this advice when Vanessa was going through a rough patch in a relationship. Her mother was basically advising her not to subordinate her own interests and emotional needs to those of her partner. That was not, and would never be, the basis for a good, long-term relationship. 

Yet these words are often more easily said than done.  Especially for young women trying hard to forge new relationships and make them work.  It’s so easy to become the best supporting actress in a major dramatic role.

Turns out, the wise words “be a star in your own movie” have a broader meaning as well.  Julyan was essentially encouraging Vanessa to follow her heart, romantically and otherwise.  She was urging her daughter to run her own race.  To find her passion and make it her pathway.

Now these are words that are both life-challenging and life-changing. They themselves deserve to be up in lights – on the spectacular marquee of life.